God's Hotel

We were talking about jail experiences this morning, how life changing they were and are. It reminded me of a poem I had been given while I was in jail back in 2002. It was so poignant and fit how I felt at the time. I was trying on becoming a 'Christian'...it fit me OK at the time, but I sort of 'outgrew' it and it started feeling a bit tight and restrictive...so I exchanged it for a better fitting belief...I believe in God and Goddess, earth, moon, stars, trees, water, wind and nature. I believe we are from the earth and will return to it and as for our souls...well, I think we get as many chances as it takes to reach perfection...a Jonathan Livingston kinda deal...kind of Buddhism, more Wicca/Pagan. Or better put the smorgasbord version of spirituality. A little of this and a spoon of that...

I was reading the bible while in jail and my friend was coming in to visit me and he would read the bible to me and pray with me. It made more sense when someone else read it to me and then could explain what they had just read. Truth be told, I did read the bible. It took a year, I had a journal that helped me. I would read a passage and then the journal asked me to write down how what I just read fit into my life and what did it mean to me. More times than not I would write 'I don't have any idea what I just read meant or how it applies to my life."

The jail Chaplain-ette (What do they call a girl Chaplain?) was named Julianna and she was amazing. She was very Christian and it was because of her that I was able to keep my sanity while in that vile place. I connected with her instantly. She gave me this poem that was written by one of the woman who had passed through the doors into the jail. She said it was one of her favorites and she thought I would enjoy it. I did and now I am sharing it with you.

God’s Hotel

I checked you in again last night my child~
Cuz it hurt so bad to see you out there, runnin’ wild.
All tired and “sucked up” you appeared to me,
Put a mirror in front of you,
You still couldn't’t see.
You’re a number among the walking dead~
Hurting yourself, confusion in your head.
Jail is not the place you want to be~
But it’s my “Hotel” where I can work on thee.
You see, you weren’t just arrested,
You were rescued from yourself.
I had to bring you back in here
And put your drug use on the shelf.
Give you some rest, some food, some encouraging talk,
To let you know I love you,
Before I let you walk.
Don't be like a mule that’s led around
By a shiny bit,
Just listen to my warning,
Let me help you quit.

All My Love,
God


Pretty cool, eh? I loved it then and I love it now. I believe with all my heart that jail saves more lives than any treatment center or rehabilitation facility on earth. That is where you have had everything in your life that got between you and God, removed. That is where you can turn down the volume in your head and be able to hear the answers to your prayers. Jail is where God has your complete and undivided attention so that he can penetrate your heart, body and soul. I believe that you don't have to wear a title of one religion or another in order to connect with God. I think God is ready, willing and able to listen to us and love us with no need of a mediator or liaison...I could be wrong but I won't know the answer to that until I actually meet with him...if there is anyone to meet at all. It would suck to be wrong about things like that, wouldn't it? Oh well...that's a gamble I am going to have to take. Have a gorgeous day.